Wednesday, December 8, 2010

HW 21 - Expert #1

1.Ms.Bernett treated everyone with respect and importance and in return received the same.
2.Ms.Bernett kept her son josh visually away from his father during this experience.
3.Ms.Bernett says that this gave experience made her realize that everyone is going to die eventually.

When Ms.Bernett came to share her experience i didn't expect that her ideas and insights would be so similar to mine. When she was sharing i could feel every emotion she was feeling, when my father was diagnosed with diabetes i remember feeling like that one kid in the world who has it the worst. When this happened i was scared to see my dad. You would expect my mother to keep me away from him but it was i who kept away. i emotionally distanced myself from him. i couldn't accept or even deal with the fact that he is going to be that way for ever and that he could go blind or his feet and hands would get numb. i tried to keep my self away from the illness by keeping myself away from the ill.This thinking really hurt the relationship that my father and i had, the relationship only began to meld back together 3 years ago when i begun to accept the fact that diabetes can be managed and that he is still the same person he was before he was diagnosed with diabetes.

Ms.Bernett's comment about how this experience made her realize that everyone is going to die eventually brought me back to the comment that was said in class a day before which was Abdullah's idea on how illness and dying gives us a sense of mortality. This comment made me think of the time that i had appendicitis, at age 8 it was one of the most frightening experiences in my life. i was surrounded by illness and death during my time in the hospital, my roommate was sick, every room i went in had either someone coughing or crying. Being surrounded by this constant feeling of pain and sickness made me think that i could die right now and this is how people would remember me. my biggest fear was that my death wouldn't mean anything giving me this sense of mortality that i had never felt before.

Ms.Bernett sparked the idea that life isn't stable. you can have a steady job and a steady relationship but in the end a million different things could happen to you. You can get hit by a car, you can get cancer, you could even fall off a cliff. When Ms.Bernett was talking about how her husband could not lay down to sleep really sparked this thought of hope and attitude (specifically because after his lungs were drained she said it was the greatest gift you could have given him). I find it very important that your attitude be positive when experiencing something as terrible as cancer. if you lose hope in yourself people begin to lose hope in you and as Ms.Bernett said what makes life great and worth living is relationships without those relationships what is holding you back from death.

4 comments:

  1. i got a similar impression from Eric deaths and the way he went about it. when someone loses hope during a time like death that is so dreadful it can hinder those around you and the one directly dealing with it. Eric ended his life in a heroic way i feel, he put out thier that death itself can be positive. Ms.Bernett noticed that herself.

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  2. Ms. Bernett's story affected me in the same way it affected you. For example Ms.Bernett's story made me realize that we are not immortal and that we could die at any place at anytime. The quote were you said, "you can have a steady job and a steady relationship but in the end a million different things could happen to you," really stood out to me because this made me realize, something very scary and it also made me realize that we are not immortal. However I believe that death is only as bad as you make it. For instance if you are screaming and just laying down in bed then you are only making your "final process" more difficult for yourself. However if you except the time that you have left on this earth and make the most of it, the "final process" wont be so difficult and this could possibly even cause less drama in your families life.

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  3. I think one important part of growing into adulthood is to realize that mortality is a universal part of life and that it does not, in fact, take away for any one person's sense of power. None of us will live forever. Sickness, as a precursor to death, gives an impression of that for many people. One common way for a young person to experience this is through the illness of a grandparent. When it is a parent instead, the lesson is more intrusive into your life as a young person.

    I think it's important to examine these feelings, understand how they act upon your own value system, and integrate them into your own life. It sounds like you have done at least some of this so far, or are on your way to it. This isn't pleasant to do, but it's necessary to become a fully-actualized adult who doesn't live in fear of death or dying. To me, your writing indicates that you have seen how the experiences that Mrs. Bernett described are similar to those in your own life. That skill is necessary to become a person who can empathize with others in order to develop compassion for your fellow person.

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  4. Sharif,
    I really enjoyed reading your post. Your post addressed this topic from many different perspectives. You managed to take the basics of Beths story and create a deeper understanding for yourself through connected it to class and other aspects of life. You were able to find the parallels in her story to your own personal experience. I appreciate your honesty and thoughtfulness through out the post. I particularly like line when you said "I tried to keep my self away from the illness by keeping myself away from the ill." Which helps explain why the ill are so isolated. It seems as though the ill want to isolated, but others do not want to be around them either. This is what puts a stress on peoples relationships.
    great job!

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